Remember back in 2006 the city of Seattle banned the sale of fortified drinks in “impact areas“? The Seattle Times said, “Supporters of the ban say those products are favored by homeless alcoholics who cause problems in city neighborhoods.” The ban went into effect on November 1.

Now the State Liquor Control Board, a Foucaultian entity if ever there was one, is launching a pilot program that will put Liquor & Wine Holiday Gift Stores in a new kind of impact area: malls. Seattle’s entry is Pacific Place, downtown on Pine Street. For symmetry, the program also starts on November 1, and underscores a persistent truth: If you’re going to be an alcoholic, it’s better to be well-off.

Harried holiday shoppers will find “spirit gift packages,” booze-based chocolates and eggnogs, and a not-so-large choice of liquor and wine. As a mall-shopper bonus, the stores will be open seven days a week (hours varying by location) through December 31.

The four stores are supposed to help bring in an extra $3.8 million dollars! That’s–ah, quick math–almost $1 million dollars per store in just two months. Drink up, Seattle! It’s for a good cause. The money is going to offset a tiny part of our state’s $9-billion-dollar deficit.

Though I didn’t see it at Sub Pop‘s (much-deserved) self-congratulatory SP20 music fest last summer, Elysian’s Loser Pale Ale was brewed specifically for the occasion.

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“Loser” pays tribute to Sub Pop’s classic, faux-emasculating slogan, of course. What’s cooler yet is the label, featuring a B&W Charles Peterson original: Mark Arm’s guitar neck splitting the crotch of fellow Mudhoney guitarist Steve Turner, circa 1988-ish. (Or is it Turner’s guitar violating Arm? It’s all axes, legs, and hair.)

You can’t ride a fuggin’ six-pack of this bright, tasty, 7% abv ale, unfortunately. It’s only available in 22oz bombers. You can pick it up at the Elysian or, if you’re lucky, find it at a city bottle shop or upscale grocery. I scored the pictured bottle a few weeks back at West Seattle’s Metropolitan Market.