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Shore Notes From a First-Time Caribbean Cruise

Heading ashore in Grenada (Photo: MvB)

This is Part Two of MvB’s adventures on the high seas: See “Shipboard Notes” here.

The most pernicious misconception I had about cruising the Caribbean was the fantasy where I spent the whole time flat on my back on a lounge chair on the upper deck, working on a tan, harassing waiters for daiquiris, and making plans for “second lunch” at the buffet.

You can do that, certainly, and cruise lines like to play up the pampering, but if you have an ounce of explorer in you, stopping at a new island each morning will have you up bright and early, ready to hit to the beach pier. There are a staggering amount of things to do each day, just choosing from among shore activities “sanctioned” by the cruise lines. (Here’s my 119-page Royal Caribbean Tour Brochure[pdf].) You just need to find out where the gangway is–it may move around depending upon the pier, and if other ships are in front of you–and head down the pier toward the people holding little signs over their heads.

Canyons of cruise lines (Photo: MvB)

In theory, your cruise line hosts have vetted these offerings for you, to make sure the vendors are reliable, committed to customer service, and determined to get you back to the ship before it departs. In most cases, we found that true, but my brother still had two tours cancelled on him, one the night before, and one the morning of, which left him suddenly embarking on a walking tour in scuba apparel. More experienced cruisers, we found, were more sanguine about hiring tour guides on arrival and haggling for cheaper prices than listed in the brochure.

Grenada from the water (Photo: MvB)

On a gray, rainy, mid-eighty-degree morning in Grenada, I went on the Island Seafaris Eco and Snorkel Tour ($84, 2 hours) which took us on a tour of the west coast’s Dragon Bay, Black Bay, Lagoon, and Carenage, with a stop at an underwater sculpture park at Molinere Point. The powerboat was a larger inflatable type you might know from rafting; you sat two abreast on a saddle seat, with a harness, and the boat zoomed about on two huge Mercurys.

Albert held up large laminated posters with maps and pictures of flora and fauna, explaining a little about Grenada’s ecology, and then, with the sun peeking out, herded everyone on a snorkel tour of the sculpture park. The clarity of the water actually gave me a vertigo-induced panic attack, but the certified dive instructor (Howard, I think) driving the boat had plenty of “nervous snorkeler” tricks up his sleeve, and had me paddling back out feeling like a snorkel genius in minutes. (Online, people report knocking as much as $20 off the price of the tour by booking directly, rather than through Royal Caribbean.)

On the way back, we tourists had a quick, informal conference of the trip on how much to tip people for tours. The consensus was a minimum of ten percent, and judging from the response I got, that would, in fact, be the minimum. Fifteen percent at least got a thank you.

Courtyard where the '83 coup took place, Ft. George, Grenada (Photo: MvB)

Back on land, I headed up the hill to see Fort George, which has a $2 entry fee, and comes with its own set of guides, who will explain the 1983 coup to you, show you bullet holes, and leave you with the impression that wounds have not completely healed yet. I was a little taken aback to learn that this historic fort was in use as both a police station and as an exercise area for the military. The views are well worth the climb, which in the tropically hot and humid weather had me dripping with sweat by the top.

View from Fort George, Grenada (Photo: MvB)

Grenada also has a nutmeg plantation and a rum distillery, as well as more forts. There’s a covered mall at St. Georges’ pier, full of tourist gift shops (nutmeg, honey, nutmeg honey) to take shelter in. One thing I hadn’t fully taken into account about the Caribbean is the frequency of little cloudbursts. You did actually want an umbrella, or at least a lightweight, rainproof windbreaker. Coming from Seattle, the gloom over Grenada that morning had me a little downcast, but Caribbean clouds are not built to last like the Northwest’s. They soon empty themselves or blow by and sunshine returns.

Roadside attraction, Dominica (Photo: MvB)

Dominica‘s outings fell into the more outdoorsy camp–it’s being marketed like an outsized nature preserve where you can go scuba diving or hiking to waterfalls or visit sulfur and hot springs. It feels more rural, the gift shops replaced by gift shacks along the side of the road, where locals sell sugar cane, woven goods, carvings, limes. Here I was driven up into the Laudat mountain range, in preparation for the Middleham Falls Hike ($44, 4 hours). They were serious about it being “strenuous,” I learned, and “rugged,” and I was glad I’d brought some lightweight hiking shoes, as there were plenty of ankle-twisting opportunities.

(Photo: MvB)

My guide was Peter Green, Bushman, of Bushman Tours, whom everyone including me recommends enthusiastically. On the way up, he rattled off facts and figures, CIA Factbook-style, about the flora and fauna; on the hike in, he stopped us to admire flowers, a huge cricket, and hanging vines that you could swing from. Middleham Falls pour into a clear pool that you rock-scramble down to for a swim, since you’re likely red-faced from the climb. On the drive back, we stopped at a hotel veranda for some rum punch, and I realized I should have brought something to eat on this trip. A hurried drive-thru visit to the Botanical Gardens was a little frustrating; I would have preferred getting out to stroll through it.

Middleham Falls, Dominica (Photo: MvB)

If there’s a drawback to Dominica, it’s that most of its attractions are the kind that tire you out by mid-afternoon, so you may find yourself heading back to the ship early, to put your feet up for a bit.

View from Shirley Heights, Antigua (Photo: MvB)

There’s no bait-and-switch to the Scenic Antigua and Beach tour ($59, 4.5 hours): For one thing, Antigua is reputed to have 365 separate beaches, so you’d hardly have seen the island if you didn’t stop in at one. For another, it’s incredibly scenic. Shirley Heights gives you achingly beautiful postcard views of Falmouth and English Harbour, and perhaps more close-up glimpses of mongoose, which, introduced in a failed attempt to kill sugar-cane robbing rats, have taken over a number of Caribbean islands.

Mongoose on patrol, Antigua (Photo: MvB)

Then you travel down to Nelson’s Dockyard, where you feel like you’re on a pirate movie set (again, enjoy some rum punch). You’re in a small coach for a good deal of the time, trying to take in the distance between tiny, hurricane-battered shacks inland and the yachts congregating the harbor.

Hotel at Nelson's Dockyard, Antigua (Photo: MvB)

Sometime on your trip it’s guaranteed that you will balk at the return to the ship, and for me, it was upon my arrival at a white, sandy Antiguan beach, where I swam, sunned, drank coconut milk through a straw, and feasted on mini-pineapples, sliced bite-size by machete. It was the quickest 90 minutes of my life.

Antigua welcomes you (Photo: MvB)
Antigua beach life (Photo: MvB)

Bustling little St. John offers the usual shopping opportunities, but walk up the hill a bit to the cathedral, too–it’s worth it.

Coastal bike tour, St. Croix (Photo: MvB)

I was looking forward to St. Croix all week, because I had reserved space on a Coastal Bike Tour ($69, 3 hours), and I wasn’t disappointed. It was 12 miles, round-trip, over mostly flat but potholed roads. We started from Freedom City Cycles‘ shop downtown with a mini-tour of Frederiksted (aka Freedom City), and then biked out to an old sugar plantation (once worked by slaves kept by the Danish) and to the beach.

Sugar plantation stop on bike tour, St. Croix (Photo: MvB)
Beachcombing on St. Croix (Photo: MvB)

Our guide Troy filled us in on island history and life in a U.S. Territory (you’re spared voting in Presidential elections, but you elect a governor every four years, and there’s a 15-senator legislature), making it an informatively scenic bike ride.

Cruzan Rum distillery, St. Croix (Photo: MvB)

In the afternoon, we arranged a taxi trip on our own to the Cruzan Rum distillery, where we learned that Cruzan Rum is bottled, in fact, in Florida. You still get to sample some, in a picturesque setting, but if I were to do it all over again, I’d rent a bike and set off somewhere else. Another historic town is Christiansted, and there’s also the chance to visit the 200-acre Creque Dam Farm, the home of the Virgin Islands Sustainable Farm Institute.

Not, I was told, Prince's house (Photo: MvB)

Finally, there was St. Thomas, which I left to go to St. John by ferry “on my own” ($34, 4 hours, 2 hours on the ferry). You get a narrated ferry ride, pointing out the houses of the rich and famous that dot the hillsides, and are dropped off at the impossibly tiny, quaint, and adorable Cruz Bay, which reminded me of what would happen if you transplanted Bainbridge Island to the Caribbean: There are two clusters of little boutiques, a picturesque harbor, and hiking trails that take you out to perfect Caribbean beaches. You actually want more than two hours, if you can swing it. You could easily spend your full day there, dividing your time between shopping for swimming apparel and putting it to good use.

Cruz Bay on St. John (Photo: MvB)
Mongoose Junction shopping on St. John (Photo: MvB)
Solomon Beach on St. John (Photo: MvB)

St. Thomas is the Caribbean island for people who don’t want to compromise on their Caribbean island experience. You can snorkel at Buck Island, hit a number of beaches, visit pirate castle attractions, or spend your entire time shopping in huge modern mall-villages or in the warren of shops in the historic downtown area, where I feel sure piracy of a kind lives on still.

Downtown shopping at Charlotte Amalie on St. Thomas (Photo: MvB)
View of St. Thomas from the Sky Ride gondola (Photo: MvB)

There’s a gondola that will take you up for a birds-eye view overlooking Charlotte Amelie–it’s just 7-minutes each way–and, yes, you can get a rum concoction at the top. Many people love St. Thomas for it’s all-in-one-ness, but it’s also the home of such banalities as traffic jams, and by the end of the afternoon I yearned for the wave-slapping peacefulness of my Antiguan beach.

Shuttle bus caravan on St. Thomas (Photo: MvB)

All this touring around adds to the cost of your cruise, of course, but it’s eye-opening often: You can easily avoid getting shuttled around in buses, emerging only at what seems like a series of T-shirt stands. Hiking, biking, and boating allow you to get different kinds of views of the islands you visit, and how people live there. (I don’t want to disparage shuttle buses–they help cover a lot of ground, but it does feel like traveling in a cocoon if that’s all you do.) Then after a full day ashore, you can retreat to the pool or lounge, sipping that chilled Stella Artois with a keen satisfaction, often having made some new friends along the way.

Shipboard Notes From a First-Time Caribbean Cruise

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A stateroom on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

A stateroom bathroom on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The space capsule stateroom shower on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

A stateroom balcony on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

A stateroom on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

A stateroom on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The pool and hot tubs on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The rock climbing wall on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The basketball court on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The view from the upper deck of Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The putt-putt golf course on Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The view from a balcony on Deck 7 of Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

The view from the upper deck of Royal Caribbean's Serenade of the Seas (Photo: MvB)

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TIP: The weeks from mid-December until Christmas are a good cruising time. Because so many people are planning holiday trips–or are planning a holiday-vacation cruise–the ships often sail below capacity, and it’s easier to get around. Plus, you’re tanned and back in time for Christmas with the family.

In Part Two of MvB’s first-time cruise series, he has adventures ashore.

When I think of vacation cruises, I tend to think of David Foster Wallace’s title, A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again. The people I know just don’t go on cruises, unless they have an excuse: visiting relatives, hip destinations, all-you-can-drink offers. But when I was casting about for ways to beat Seattle’s December gloom, the prospect of a Caribbean cruise seemed worth considering. I had never been to the Caribbean before, so why not try the sampler of vacations? Cruise lines were just waiting to pounce.

It’s hard to beat the price. My trip on Royal Caribbean, with air fare, drinks, and daily excursions totaled about $300 per day for the seven-day cruise. For that, I arrived in Puerto Rico on December 10, and dined my way across the evenings between five ports of call: Grenada, Dominica, Antigua, St. Croix, and St. Thomas, returning to San Juan on December 17.

This is more or less all I knew about cruising before flying out of Seattle. I knew there was a formal night, that you were expected to eat dinner at either six or eight in the dining room (you had to choose), that I would have a bottle of Evian for each day of the cruise, and that on Thursday, I was going on a coastal bike tour. Royal Caribbean had provided me with a 119-page pdf of ship activities and shore excursions that so daunted me all I could manage to schedule in advance was the biking outing. I never managed to read the helpful What to Pack page, but I had found a few minutes for the online check-in.

We were met at the airport, and herded into a shuttle to the Serenade of the Seas, a ship nearly 1,000 feet long and just over 100 feet wide at its broadest. At check-in, after stripping for security, I gained possession of my SeaPass, an electronic key and on-board credit card that would collect all ship charges for me, billed at the conclusion of the cruise. (You can specify which card or cards you want the damage billed to; usually it’s from alcohol or visits to the gift shops) The first surprise was the size of the stateroom–I had been on enough boats not to expect a majestic expanse, but the balcony stateroom managed to feel positively roomy.

On the other hand, the Serenade–due for a facelift in 2012–showed its age a bit. The stateroom TV wasn’t a flat panel, but a tubed variety, sporting a distinctive green cast across the bottom third from years of use. (The projector in the ship’s cinema was also worn or in need of maintenance. There are parts of Thor I can’t describe to you because they were a muddy haze–which, of course, is both a plus and a minus.)

No one from a sunlight-challenged area will need me to explain the attraction of sailing around the Caribbean, but I think I have a supplemental theory on why cruises are so popular.

When you arrive on board a cruise ship, you may have nine or more stories to explore. There will be any number of lounges, cafes, bars, buffets, casinos, pools, libraries, business centers, cinemas, rock-climbing walls, sport courts, fitness centers, arcades, and so on for you to unearth. Because the process of discovery is related to rewarding spurts of dopamine, learning to navigate the ship is a strangely pleasurable experience. Everywhere you look in this particular maze, you find cheese. (To capitalize on our need to explore, Royal Caribbean charges $150 per person for “behind the scenes” ship tours that take you to the galley and engine room.)

Throw in your sudden re-exposure to sunlight, and you find yourself engulfed in a particularly heady neurochemical bath (I actually suspect the shock to the system of unsettling the digestive system of cruisers–dopamine is secreted in the gut, too–as much as exposure to different bacteriological flora.) That first afternoon, you spend your time navigating the decks, continually running into dopamine-dazed travelers laying down new neurological tracks.

Perhaps to counter the stress of the novel environment, life on board hews to a fairly rigid routine. You arrive in port around 7 or 8 in the morning, you sail at 4:30 or 5 p.m. There’s breakfast, lunch, and dinner. If you want, you can schedule your day down to the hour with activities like bingo or trivia or foot “analysis.” These days you can also pay for packages that let you continue to yap on your cell phone while at sea, or surf the internet, though everyone who tried the internet complained of the dial-up-era absence of speed. I was happy for the excuse to unplug.

A few things that I assume are enshrined by cruising ritual didn’t appeal to me that much: dinner in the dining room, for instance. I don’t enjoy being fussed over each and every night, and there was a marked discrepancy between the air of fine dining and the actual quality of the meal. I tried the dining room for two nights (there’s a little social coercion, in that you are the tablemates of a group of fellow passengers for the cruise) but never had a memorable (or even quite good) meal there, and after being scolded mildly for choosing a wine that wasn’t “suggested” as the pairing for my dinner, I quit attending in favor of the Windjammer Cafe’s buffet, which at least allowed you the chance to see how the food was prepared, and to head back for seconds of anything you did like.

Ironically, we ended up bonding with two of our tablemates everywhere but in the dining room; they were on an anniversary cruise, found the dining room cooking tough to swallow, and decided the trip was too short to suffer through. Another vote for the buffet. I did try the specialty grill restaurant for a filet mignon, and that was more successful, but also more expensive. At the Schooner Bar, my happy hour hangout, I gave up on the relentlessly fruit-punchy drinks for Stella Artois, the best beer I could find on the list, which included no Caribbean beers except Red Stripe.

It’s possible to drop out of the shipboard social set fairly easily, if you want. Occasionally you will notice more tuxedos and formal gowns than usual, and will remember that it’s formal night. Posed pictures are taken on the staircase of ruddy-faced men in rented suits and middle-aged women dressed for prom, a contest is held for World’s Sexiest Man, a sort of dating game is held, and the David Foster Wallace allusion swims into clearer focus. I have no reason to think people weren’t enjoying themselves, but this is the cheesiness that makes other people defensive about taking a cruise.

Forsaking the Tropical Theatre’s entertainments–“Your Three Tenors” and a lot of show tunes–I spent a lot of time reading Game of Thrones on a chaise lounge, hit the stationary bikes in the fitness center to prep for my coastal bike tour, and hot tubbed.

Usually I was tired from my day ashore: I ended up going on tours every morning in our ports of call, snorkeling, hiking to a waterfall, taking a bus tour to scenic spots, biking the coast, and hopping a ferry from St. Thomas to St. John, where I bought swim trunks with anchors on them and walked out to Solomon Beach along a nature trail frequented mainly by tiny, hopping lizards. The weather was changeable, if always warm, veering between sudden showers and bright, hot sun, and usually I headed back to the ship for a noon shower and lunch, running through my supply of clothes faster than I’d thought. Thankfully, the Serenade had laundry service, and St. John had a boutique with a sale on boxers.

Ships of this size don’t give you much reason to worry about the sea below. One night we saw seven-foot swells, the next nine-foot, and it was only then that I started to hear people mention feeling queasy. If you are from an earthquake-prone area, you may jolt awake after a slow roll that feels just like a quake (in fact there were two 5.0 quakes just off Puerto Rico as we were heading back to port), but in general, it feels most like a waterbed, and gives you an excuse as to why you’re stumbling rubber-legged down the corridor after your trip to the bar.

Royal Caribbean, like most cruise lines, I suppose, tries to deliver “wow” moments of service. Hundreds of staff do their best to pamper you, or surprise you with folded-towel animals in your stateroom. They’re forever seeing you once and then calling you by name for the rest of cruise, as if you’re a long-time customer. They strike up conversations with anyone who looks the least bit lonely. Sometimes it feels desperate and needy; sometimes you have conversations with people from Bosnia or Nicaragua that give you slices of insight into other worlds. Every night I’d go up on deck and watch the sun set on the Caribbean, and each night it was a different spectacle. In the morning, there was that second where I struggled to locate where I was, a new island coming into view.

I could never quite believe it. The Caribbean. After all these years, it was right there. I could practically reach out and touch it.

Disney to Cruise From Seattle in 2012

Disney Wonder

The Port of Seattle is, you imagine, thrilled that, a few years after Disney picked Vancouver over Seattle as the embarkation point for its Alaska cruises, Disney has decided to give Seattle another chance. Disney will move 14 of the 18 cruises it had planned for 2012 to Seattle, all aboard the Disney Wonder, a 10-deck ship which carries 2,400 passengers, three swimming pools, and no casinos. This is family-friendly Disney, after all.

On their 7-night roundtrip cruise, passengers will stop in Skagway; Juneau; Tracy Arm, a fjord near Juneau; and Ketchikan, for a taste of Alaska. Canada doesn’t miss out on tourist dollars entirely; there’s also a port of call at Victoria, B.C.

Port representative Peter McGraw couldn’t speak for Disney on their choice, but he did mention that it appeared costs were lower in Seattle, and stressed that since the Port ran both the cruise terminals and Sea-Tac International Airport, there were conveniences it could offer passengers who flew in to cruise.

This year’s cruise season begins Friday, April 15, with the arrival of the Crystal Cruise’s Symphony at Bell Street Pier at 9 a.m. In the cruise business, the Port has something to be proud of in tough economic times:

Seattle’s cruise business—currently leading all U.S. cruise homeports on the west coast in passenger volume and number of ship calls—is responsible for more than 4,447 jobs, $425 million in annual business revenue, and nearly $19 million annually in state and local tax revenues. Each vessel call generates almost $2 million for the local economy.

In 2009, Seattle consoled itself at being skipped over with the news that Disney was rapped by Friends of the Earth for the environmental damage the group claimed its cruise ships were causing.

In 2010, FOE rated Disney “Most Improved,” but most importantly, when it comes to sewage, where Seattle’s  current cruise ship crop has sometimes failed, Disney scores an A. The Disney Wonder uses the most advanced sewage treatment available, and by the time it sails from Seattle, will also be outfitted to be able to plug into shore power, so its engines don’t have to power the boat in port.