The Muppets always creeped me out as a kid, but I want to like them now because Jason Segel likes them and he seems like a rad guy. When I saw that the fuzzy puppets had covered Nirvana’s “Teen Spirit”—and that Dave Grohl apparently plays on the soundtrack for the new Muppets flick starring Segel—I assumed I’d be converted.

Nope. Still creeped out. The a cappella treatment lets Beeker’s high pitch shine, conjuring images of that nightmare-inducing cylindrical head, pivoting mouth, and lab coat. And it leaves Animal, who I actually thought was pretty cool, out altogether—no madly pounded drums, no evocation of long, flying Muppet hair. No Dave Grohl assist.

Segel and Amy Adams have their “Remember the Muppets? They’re awesome!” work cut out for them if this is how their hand-manipulated friends address sacred melodic rock. (Okay, there are a couple of grin-inspiring moments in the song.) I’m not the only one who still cringes at the sight of Kermit the Frog’s flapping, snakelike face, am I? Those sinister old dudes seated above the stage? Gonzo’s phallic face?